Title: Thirty-four Minutes in the Life of Brian
Author: Pteropod
E-mail: beth_monster@yahoo.com
Category: MSR, I guess. I'm bad with categorization.
Rating: PG
Summary: Thirty-four minutes on a day between Je Souhaite and Requiem.
Disclaimer: These characters belong to Chris Carter and 1013 Productions, not to me. Bummer.
Thanks to: Zuffy, for always-fantastic beta AND providing a home for my stories.
Feedback: Sure, I'd love it.

-- Basement office, Hoover Building, 11:14am --

"Hey Scully?"


"Have you ever seen 'The Life of Brian'?"


"You're kidding."


"Did someone force you to watch it?"



"Why do you assume I wouldn't just go to the video store on a lonely Friday night and decide to rent it for myself?"

"Is that what happened?"


-- 11:17am --

"Why did you ask?"

"You know that song? The one at the end?"


"You're kidding."

"Enough with the kidding. Yes, I know the song."

"It's been stuck in my head all day. Ever since I was driving to work this morning and saw a billboard for CellularOne."

"Don't you dare sing it. Don't you dare."

"I saw the billboard and it made me think about that other phone company, the one with the parrot. Then the parrot sketch leapt unbidden into my head and suddenly all I could think about was that damn song. I haven't been able to get rid of it all day."

"You know, I'm appalled that it's not even a challenge for me to follow that train of thought."

-- 11:20am --

"Do you really think I'm that un-fun? That I wouldn't like Monty Python?"

"I reserve judgement on the Monty Python issue, but otherwise I'd say that you've proven yourself to be very fun. Particularly in recent weeks."

"Jesus, Mulder. Has it escaped you that we're at work?"

-- 11:22am --

"So you like Monty Python?"

"I've been known to have an appreciation, yes. Especially when I was in med school and even more especially when I was drunk."

"And you've seen 'The Life of Brian'?"

"I have. And the 'Holy Grail' and most of the Flying Circus episodes."

"And you like it?"

"You have a problem with that?"

"Why is it so hard for you to just say the words?"

"Alright. I like it. There are times when I think Monty Python is funny."

-- 11:24am --

"Damn you for getting that song into my head."

-- 11:27am --



"Do you know the verses?"

"One of them. The last one, I think. Or maybe it's the second to last."


"Mulder, you know how badly I sing. Don't make me do this."



"It would mean a lot to me."

"That's manipulative."

"It's true, though."

"Ok, ok. I give in.

'For life is quite absurd,
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow!
Forget about your sin -- give the audience a grin,
Enjoy it -- it's the last chance anyhow!'"

"I'd like to take this opportunity to mention that your cranial capacity is mind-boggling."

"C'mon. Chorus time. 'Always look on the bright side of life...'"

-- 11:30am --

"Not to mention that I had no idea you could whistle like that."

"Full of hidden talents, I guess."

"Do you know that you constantly amaze me?"

-- 11:32am --

"Hey Mulder?"

"Uh huh?"

"I constantly amaze you?"

"Every day."

-- 11:35am --

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For telling me that."

-- 11:37am --

"'Always look on the bright side of life...'"

-- 11:39am --

"Damn you to hell and back for getting that song into my head."

"Insidious, isn't it?"

-- 11:41am --

"At least it's not the Sperm Song. Or the Lumberjack song."

-- 11:43am --

"'I'm a lumberjack and I'm ok.
I sleep all night and I work all day..."

"Mulder, you are evil incarnate."

"You brought it up."

-- 11:45am --

"Oh lord, Mulder. What if the office is bugged?"

"Then somebody other than me has learned exactly how well you can put your lips together and blow."

"I can't believe you just said that."

-- 11:46am --

"'Always look on the bright side of life...'"

-- 11:47am --

"You know, I think the bright side of life can be found at the deli on 8th and D."

"Will you do a silly walk on the way there?"

"For you, Scully, anything."


"Always. You just hardly ever ask."

-- 11:48am --

"Then let's get going, G-man."

-- the end --