LGW's Theory of Relativity
From: Lone Gunwoman
Email feedback to: tburchill@yahoo.com
Date: 12/10/99

LGW's Theory of Relativity: An MSR theory

(1) A viewer (us) outside of the frame of reference (the XF world) find that our lengths of measurement of UST are expanded by 1013 by a given amount in their own formula.

(2) Each viewer (with the exception of Lucyskull) finds that the clock of UST in the frame of reference runs much more slowly than outside.

(3) There is no absolute time. Events that would be simultaneous outside of the frame of reference may not be inside of it.

(4) The observable romance within the frame of reference increases as it moves faster towards its end.
Closely connected with the romance-increase effect is the formula
UST = CC (squared-up): Romance and sexual tension are no longer conserved, but can be interconverted. Note: the conversion of this romance to energy has explosive power.

This brings me on to the
Naked Pretzel Paradox (NPP), which has come to light post-Millennium. Where two similar material systems - in this case, the "viewed" XF world and the "hidden" XF world - and given an inertial frame of reference, the one that is moved quickly away from the other (the one that is viewed) necessarily moves slower than the other. Which brings me to the conclusion that it would be against all known theories of UST that, post Millennium kiss, the MSR would continue in the UST mode, albeit flirtatious, smiley, touchy. Hence, outside of the viewed XF universe, says the NPP, naked pretzel pre-ambling is faster and has, in fact, led up to the naked pretzel itself. The "viewers" are just not viewing it, as per the Naked Pretzel Law of CC. I approximate that just prior to the XF universe being engulfed in its own dark matter, CC will introvert the NPP and the NPL and the viewed world will become one with the unviewed.

Reference material: Encyclopedia Britannica - "Einstein". XF from S1 Pilot to S7 Rush.

Gratuitous Cleavage Duality - a new theory

By Lone Gunwoman

I've noticed an increasing number of gratuitous Scully cleavage moments in S7, culminating in not one, but two in En Ami. Further scietific study has led me to a new hypothesis - gratuitious cleavage duality (GCD). This states that the increase in gratuitous cleavage moments on screen is directly parallel to naked pretzel moments off screen.
The naked pretzel paradox (which states that a sexual relationship between M&S is ongoing off screen) has not been disproved thus far. LJ mentioned the look on Mulder's face in Skinner's office (*En Ami). Then there was the scene towards the end when they were looking at the disk - it was loaded with sexual tension. Far more was said in them not touching. It was like the gunmen's presence was stopping an explosion of emotion. Yes, there was anger from Mulder, but you could practically see the electricty sparking between them, imho, anyway. And when CSM does his pop pyschology bit in the car, S's look when he says "you won't allow yourself to love him" could very well be a look that says "what the hell do you know".

Xena Deviation and Gratuitous T-shirts

By Zuffy
More science, eh, LGW? How can the rest of us keep up with all this theorizing? Yes there has definitely been a good bit of cleavage-sighting whether it reflects that the NPP is at work or simply that Scully wishes it were at work. <g> That leads me to a possible corollary to the Gratuitous Cleavage Duality. (Duality! I love it. You are such a tease.)

Herewith the CC Xena Deviation. In Biogenesis (the Nuclear Bra Scene), in Amor Fati (the Darkness upon All Shippers Moment), and in En Ami (the Dress of Doom), we see two female professionals having to use their cleavage as weapons in the battle between good and evil. No wonder Scully sighed as she took the gown from CSM. Did she expect to have to follow where that dress might lead? What would you give for a cure for the world's diseases? But wait, there's more… Back in her apartment Scully equips her cleavage for battle by stealthily clipping her microphone -- the link to Mulder -- to her bra. If only FM had known where she had nested their connection! Yet, to push the symbolism way beyond all reasonable limits, CSM's scenario forces Scully herself to remove the mike/connection to Mulder. He does not unhook it in the unseen Pajama Quandry Incident. No, she must herself decide to which purpose her bosom must be directed.

And, have you noticed there seem to be a lot more Gratuitous Mulder T-shirt Manifestations than ever before - not that I am complaining - including a key redeeming moment in Chimera. What do you make of this, LGW? And don't tell me it's because DD hates suits. No, there must be a deeper meaning, a message to fans, a portent, a metaphor.

Re ; Xena Deviation and Gratuitous T-shirts

From: Lone Gunwoman
Well, of course I'm not going to say the Gratuitous T-shirt Manifestations are because DD hates suits! What kind of pseudo scientist do you take me for? I have postulated a couple of theories but they've yet to undergo the rigours of scientific analysis, so you'll have to bear with me.
(1) It's all to do with atmospheric pressure and the juxtaposition of the xf reality v the real reality. The T-shirt manifestations tell us that in the xf reality, atmospheric conditions tend to be a little different from real reality. That is, it's warmer. For example, winter in Tennessee in xf reality is sunny and there are leaves on the trees. Hence the T-shirt manifestation.
(2) The T-shirts manifestations are specific DD devices to draw attention away from deviating plot developments. Hence, we think fondly of *Chimera that was otherwise dire in all other departments.